Significance 8-30-10

“Then there was an argument among them as to which of them would be the greatest….Then He said to them…‘Whoever is the least among you is the greatest.’” Lk. 9:46; 48

Just prior to this verse, in Lk. 43-45, we learn that everyone was marveling over the wonderful things Jesus was doing. The disciples in particular were so caught up in outward appearances and personal significance issues that they completely missed what Jesus said next: listen and remember. Knowing full-well that they would not understand, Jesus went on to tell them about His betrayal. And wouldn’t you know it, rather than focusing on what Jesus was trying to communicate to them, the very next thing the disciples do is argue over who’s greatest among them!

The crowd focused on the miracles, Jesus focused the disciples in on His betrayal, and the disciples chose to focus on who’s the greatest. ~~That’s a pretty sad commentary! But aren’t we just like them today? …At times, don’t we get caught up in our personal agendas and miss Jesus’ primary speaking point? …Don’t we secretly (or not so secretly) wonder why we weren’t dealt a more significant role in this world…or better recognized for the role we do play?

Jesus exhorts us to listen and remember words such as these:

• We are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Eph. 2:10  God crafted my unique purpose before I was born.
• The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me. Ps. 138:8  God has a distinct calling on my life.  
• He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Phil.1:6 God started this work and He will finish it. 
• No one takes this honor upon himself; he must be called by God, just as Aaron was. Heb.5:4 God’s in charge of recognition & results, I’m in charge of obeying His promptings.

 God beckons us to realize our personalized calling and to make the most of our unique positions of influence as He directs. ~~Not reserving ‘our best’ for clout positions, while neglecting the significance of our influence in the common places of our everyday lives (like our role as a mentor, friend, father, husband, wife, or mother). No, like with Jesus and His disciples, it’s within these more common places and relationships that our unique calling is generally most valuable. ~~How many of us know successful business personalities, pastors, etc. who seem to “have it all”…only to find that their intimate relational life is a dysfunctional mess?

A personal illustration: After diligently seeking God’s counsel, years ago we chose to keep Betsy from a money-making job outside the home in order for her to fulfill her call of “domestic engineer and neck”. (What’s a neck? Simply put, two head chiefs in one home don’t function optimally. So, in our household, Shaun’s the “head of the household” and Betsy’s the “neck of influence”!)

And ever since making this ‘outside the cultural norm decision’, we’ve had to overcome regular raised eyebrow questioning as to Betsy’s worth as ‘a value-add human for our industrious society’…especially when we lived in the Bay Area. (At times, particularly during the hormonal baby-nursing years, this societal pressure really got to her!) ~~For not until 15-20 years later have we and society even begun to see the enormous influence that this pivotal God-directed decision continues to make.

Question: Do you believe God has a unique purpose for your life? If so, are you victoriously walking in it? If so, keep on keeping on!!! And if not…why not???

God bless you this week!

Shaun and Betsy

Standing in the Gap 8-23-10

“I looked for a man among them who would build up the wall and stand before Me in the gap on behalf of the land so I would not have to destroy it, but I found none.” Ezek. 22:30

The NIV tells us that the wall spoken of here is not made of stones, but one of faithful people united in their efforts to resist evil. Likened to our present day, this wall of faith was in disrepair yet few would step up to lead these unfaithful sheep back to God.

We Cleary’s just returned from a week’s trek through the Sierra’s before dropping our middle son off at college in the Bay Area. As we hiked North Dome in Yosemite and immersed ourselves in this indescribable grandeur of God’s creation, it was difficult to contain our awestruck wonder of God Almighty! Yet as we ended our Yosemite portion of the trip and entered our time in San Francisco, we were awoken to the sad realization that despite the “high” we just experienced with our Savior, the reality is, this world system mocks and denies His very existence. And to flourish within our societal system, yet not be assimilated into it, requires a diligent swim upstream in the waterways of the cultural norm.

So the next day, as we emotionally readied ourselves to drop off Conner at Stanford University (a prestigious school in society’s eyes, but one that embraces the ways of this world), we beseeched God with this short request:

~~Will you consider joining us and pray this over yourself and those you love?

“Lord Jesus, please bless us with a progressing revelation of You, Your will, and a deeper understanding of the boundaries/walls You’ve placed in and around our lives…walls You’ve placed for our benefit (not to somehow constrain us from happiness). Then, with this divine understanding and discernment will You help us to live within these boundaries while we uncompromisingly violate the culture around us with Your love and for Your glory? Lord, please help us to be so connected with You in relationship that our own sinful desires become exceedingly distasteful to us. And then, if need be, help us to stand ‘in the gap’ (like Noah) and speak against the evils of our day. Lord, please give us Your eyes into the culture, circumstances and relationships around us, and give us divine discernment to interact with them as You would. Amen.”



God bless you this week!

Much love,

Shaun and Betsy

Dominance Kills 8-9-10

“For you have been called to live in freedom-not freedom to satisfy your sinful nature, but freedom to serve one another in love. ... Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” Gal. 5:13 and Eph. 5:21

In any significant relationship, habitual dominance within the relationship destroys the relationship. Dominance is a gender-neutral sin, and sadly, Shaun & Betsy (two driven, energetic, get-it-done-yesterday, Type-A individuals) have both taken turns at the “dominance steering wheel” of our relationship. Author and Pastor Jimmy Evans explains this negative dynamic:

“Dominance is one of the most damaging dynamics that can exist in any relationship--especially in marriage. God simply didn't intend for marriage to be a relationship where one spouse would dominate the other.

To understand this, we have to go back to the Garden of Eden before the fall of mankind. In the Bible, there isn't a reference indicating that Adam was superior to Eve, or vice versa, until the fall. After Adam and Eve ate of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, God pronounced a curse over them. In Genesis 3:16, we find that He told Eve her desire would be for her husband and he [Adam] would rule over her. The word 'desire' in that scripture means 'a desire to usurp authority'.


Dominance and a struggle for power or superiority in a marriage are the result of our fallen nature, and they destroy intimacy and goodwill in the relationship. ~~And there is only one answer--both spouses must surrender themselves to the authority of Christ and stop trying to control the marriage. This means the dominant spouse must have a humble attitude and ‘stand down’. It also means the dominated spouse must stop enabling the dominance. He or she must lovingly ‘stand up’ and take an active, equal position in the relationship.”

The good news for us Cleary’s is that we’re learning to recognize this harmful mannerism fairly readily. And through the ups, the downs and the seasons of life, daily we consciously surrender ourselves to God’s authority, seek His will, and allow Him to teach us how to serve and submit to one another. (In our differing roles as ‘the head and the neck’, we are equal partners under God’s authority.)

All of us have experienced the negative consequences of dominance in relationships near and dear to us. And we are wise to remember that although we can influence another, we can change no one but ourselves. ~~Single or married, we pray your significant relationships flourish this week as you seek Him!

Much love,
Shaun and Betsy

Developing Character 8-2-10

“So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.” Gen. 1:27

“For those God foreknew He also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of His Son.” Rom. 8:29

Each of us, created in Christ’s image, are now being conformed and transformed into His likeness. This is some serious business! And God stops at nothing to accomplish His goal in our lives, personally orchestrating a symphony of events, circumstances, and relationships, which produce a divine melody in this ultimate objective.

One of His favorite means of conforming and transforming us is through significant relationships in our lives, marriage in particular. Likened to the saying, “God didn’t make marriage to make us happy, He made marriage to make us grow up”; God uses our most treasured relationships as His conduit for change. And it is in the marriage relationship specifically, beyond any other human relationship, that our character is most tested and refined. (It’s no wonder that Paul desired to remain single! 1Cor. 7:32)

Marriage, more than an other relationship, will test us to our core…testing our patience, our willingness to forgive, our ability to submit to another’s desires, our sensitivity and love towards others, and our integrity to the promise that we made on our wedding day. And there is no other relationship when lived out to God’s intended design, produces a greater picture of the Trinity and His relationship with His bride, us. ~~It’s no wonder Satan attacks marriage. When we say “I DO”, we tend to think “bliss forevermore”, but in reality, we’ve just picked a fight of cosmic proportions. (Again, it’s no wonder that Paul desired to remain single!)

Each of us, married or single, are profoundly influenced (positively and negatively) by the marriages around us…our parents, our relatives, our friends. When married couples we love struggle, we too experience pain … conversely, when couples we love are mirroring Christ’s passion in their relationships, we too are lifted to a higher plane. ~~And right now in our lives, God seems to be performing a miracle with Shaun’s parent’s brokenness, as they work to “reconcile and finish strong” in their marriage of 49 years.

It's been an extremely difficult number of years for our personal family, but Friday evening we got together as family for the first time in nearly 3 years. Although trust still needs to be built, we had a wonderful evening full of laughter and stories as we celebrated our Shannon’s birthday…together.

Jimmy Evans says, “Before marriage will make you happy it will make you grow up. And when you are experiencing marriage problems it is often the Lord dealing with a character issue.” We whole heartedly agree.

God bless you! ~ Shaun and Betsy

Refreshing Authenticity 7-27-10

“These have come so that your faith of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire, may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.” 1Pet. 1:7


Throughout the 4 gospel accounts, we see Jesus model a perspicacious life of transparent authenticity. ~~And there’s not much that is more refreshing and endearing than a person who is secure enough in knowing he/she is cherished by God, that he/she lives with a spirit of winsome openness void of guile. Know people like this? They’re magnetic! And one just feels “good” being near them…probably because a person like this is not characterized by ‘living to impress others’, but by ‘living to make a loving impact in lives around them’.

 

Hearts are drawn to transparent authenticity. ~~When we live to impress others, we may “wow” them and win them over to “our power team”, but we won’t make friends. As the saying goes, “to have a friend, one must be a friend.” And generally speaking, true friendship necessitates transparent sharing of lives … the transparency of a child. (“Then Jesus called for the children and said to the disciples, "Let the children come to Me, don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I assure you, anyone who doesn’t have their kind of faith will never get into the Kingdom of God.” Lk. 18:16-17)

 

Think for a minute about someone in your life that is refreshing to your soul…perhaps someone who is perhaps going through a tough challenge of some sort. Someone who, rather than becoming bitter and bemoaning their present circumstances, is living out his/her challenge in transparent honesty before others with child-like faith. Got this person in mind? What draws you to him or her?

 

For us, we believe that we humans are a whole lot more alike than we are different, and it is refreshingly restorative and inspirational to witness how another soul deals with the highs and lows of this life as he/she lives authentically before us…Jesus Himself being our finest example (check out the gospel accounts). ~~And through His example, God now exhorts us:

• “I have given you an example to follow. Do as I have done to you.” Jn. 13:15
• “Follow God’s example in everything you do, because you are His dear children.” Eph. 5:1
• “This suffering is all part of what God has called you to. Christ, who suffered for you, is your  example. Follow in His steps.” 1Pet. 2:21

Life is hard! And no one gets a hall pass… (1 Thess. 3:2b-3). So if you are presently experiencing a difficult “desert place“, God is with you as He was with His people in the desert of Egypt. Be encouraged and remember “…the Lord your God leads you all the way in the desert…to humble you and to test you in order to know what is in your heart, whether or not you will keep His commands. He humbles you, causing you to hunger and then feeds you with manna…to teach you that man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord….For these trials are only to test you faith, to show that it is strong and pure. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold…and your faith if far more precious to God than mere gold.” Deut. 8:2-3 and 1Pet. 1:7

 

With child-like faith, let’s determine to live out the highs and lows of this life as Paul did with the Thessalonians, “We loved you so much that we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God, but our lives as well.” 1 Thess. 2:8

 

Much love,

Shaun and Betsy

Soar on Wings like Eagles 7-19-10

“But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” Is.40:31


In this life, we simply cannot inoculate ourselves against pain and heartache. Whether its relationship difficulties, health issues, employment challenges, pain someone we love is experiencing, or flat out mental and emotional depression, many of us could use a little “soaring on eagle’s wings” right now.

In redeeming this world to Himself, Jesus desires each of us to not just know of Him and His ways, but to intimately know Him… And unfortunately for us (with our fallen human nature) this kind of intimacy with our Savior is generally realized in times of adversity and heartache rather than times of prosperity and pleasure. In 2Cor. 4:7-9; 16-18, Paul shares about his own trials: “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day…Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”

This week, Betsy celebrated a milestone birthday, and amidst all the “Betsy-story-telling”, family and friends were once again reminded that it’s been in high and low shared experiences (vs. isolated personal experiences) that we have forged the deepest bonds with one another and with God. And it’s been in the toughest times that we have grown the tightest and matured the most with one another and with Christ.

~~~ So, in honor of 2 milestone birthdays, Shaun took Betsy and son, Conner, for a small taste of ‘heavenly soaring’… (soaring to the likes of jumping out of an airplane that is!) ~What a thrill, and with no fear (no joke). We were so calm! Perhaps it was the fact that we didn’t actually jump and were pushed out of the plane J? No, we were without fear because our master jump instructors, Randy and Chris, seemed 100% confident and in control, and we chose to rely 100% on their expertise, implicitly following their instructions.

After the jump, we got to thinking…If we so readily entrusted our lives to two expert jump instructors, why do we ever question or fear ‘jumps of faith’ in life when our Expert Life Instructor is Jesus Christ Himself, Who IS in 100% confident and in 100% sovereign control? ~~Remember what Jesus said in John 16:33? “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” What confidence and hope this gives us!

Storms of life are going to happen, but it’s when we go through a storm utterly dependent upon Jesus, and not ourselves, that we overcome. And it’s in our ‘overcoming’ that we mature in character; we gain greater clarity on the purpose of this life’s “vapor”; we see Jesus in better HD; and God uses our “overcoming and enduring” experience as an illustration to encourage others in His body of believers, thus building unity within His church, and strength within it’s members (us!). Too cool.

So, God bless you this week as we determine to be “over-comers”, enduring to the end!
(Please feel free to join us for our final 2 weeks Proverbs 1-4 study… 3 international scholars joined us last week; what a joy!!!)

Much love,
Shaun and Betsy